Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Dating with Kids & a budget


Ladies we all know how hard dating can be and when you add kids to the mix, it becomes a little more difficult. Something switches in our brains when we have kids and everything is instantly all about the kids, but sometimes single mothers need to think about themselves (we all know if momma isn't happen, no one is happy). That's where the attempt of dating with kids comes in.
Dating when you have children is no where near easy, first you have to make plans far in advance to find a baby sitter, then you have to tell your kids that mommy is leaving to hang out with a "friend" (you never want to introduce kids to the thought of mommy being with a man before your positive this guy is going to stick around), last you should tell your date you have children & that you have a "curfew". Sounds difficult doesn't it?
I'm here to tell you dating can happen when you have kids, it's not easy but if you find a man that understands your children come first you can make it work. I have been in a relationship for almost 6months now(it's been my dirty little secret) so far it's going wonderful. We started off the relationship being very open & honest, I broke it to him that I am a mother of two instantly & to my surprise that didn't scare him off. We had our first real date about a month after meeting, that's where the budget comes in. I explained to my boyfriend that it's important to me to save money and would like to see him do the same, our first date we went to the dollar movies and then had a nice yet cheap dinner at Olive Garden. If I'm being honest I have to say it was the best date I ever went on. 
Now each month on our anniversary we do something fun but fits our budget, we have gone bowling, gone to the movies (Skip the drinks & food), movie night in. We discovered we don't need to go out to big fancy dinners, or do trips to theme parks. In these 6months we haven't spent much money on dates just to make sure our future is set with the children. 

 BIG ANNOUNCEMENT HERE: After falling in love (almost instantly) and the kids approving of "mommy's friend" he popped the big question. We have been planning a very low budget wedding for Fall of 2014. 

11 comments:

Erinn Sluka said...

It certainly would take the right man!

Amanda T said...

Aw, I'm so happy you were able to find the perfect guy! It's great when they can be understanding.

Also, congratulations! I bet you can't wait for 2014 :D

Shauna Torres said...

Awe, you sound so happy and seem to be taking things at a good pace... I am very excited and happy for you

Donna said...

I'm glad I don't have to do the dating scene. :) But my Mom after she divorced my father met a man who loved us (my siblings and I) as if we were his own. That was 36 years ago, and to this day I consider him my Dad. :) I'm glad you found that special person.

premar88 said...

its nice that you found a way to work that out.I have been taking care of my mentally challenged sister for a few years so I have not found time to date but this makes me think should get back out there

Kas said...

Awwww CONGRATS!!
Kas

Renae C. said...

I am in awe of all the single parents out there! Congratulations on your wedding!

Becca Wilson said...

Awwww congrats honey! I can't even imagine dating while having kids. I have kids and it's hard enough to find date nights with my hubs haha

earthlingorgeous said...

awww dating is so stressful when you consider your kids in mind.me I stopped dating and embraced my single mom blessedness and I've never been happier so stress free and I am totally free from man stress lolz.

Ronnie E. said...

How sweet <3 I love the fact that you fell in love instantly. It's a beautiful story!

I'm all about smart budgeting myself, so I completely know where you come from.I actually even wrote an article on 20 free & cheap date ideas!

http://www.allthefrugalladies.com/20-heap-date-ideas/

Carrie Ostergard said...

It definitely is a challenge dating. I met my bf in 07, we had a lot of ups and downs but definitely worth it. We have an almost 3 year old son, I have 2 sons from my previous marriage and he has a son from a previous as well. I wouldn't trade out for the world and yes there are still some days that are a challenge.